It's still so very hard because I can still see it as being tacky, white people doing Native American spiritual practices and such. I can see how people would see it as tacky, y'know. Here, us white folks didn't do all the suffering that Native American folks did at the hands of white people, no less. And then we get to go and benefit from all their traditions, when it's our very own ancestors that made them do suffering and took away their traditions and all that.
I dunno, man. I should be working on paperwork right now. I haven't thought about the sweat lodge thing in a while, even though I'm planning on going to one this Saturday. The person running it is actually half Native American, it sounds like. And part Celtic, too.
Is it a bad thing I'm doing? Dunno, man. Ed McGaa, a Native American guy, he says that it's good for white people to do Native American spiritual practices, cuz - I forgot exactly why, but it was good.
I guess not everybody has the same opinion on the topic, or all that. It's just ironic and weird that this affinity I have for Native American spiritual traditions (and I have no idea where this affinity comes from) is something that might make me look bad in the eyes of at least some Native American people.
And who knows? Maybe I am tacky. It's strange to think, but I'm not always the good guy. I can be the bad guy because not everybody is good all the time. I didn't want to be bad in this instance cuz it makes me feel dumb. No, I didn't want to be bad.